I don’t think I’ll sustain a daily cadence of writing about the CFAR workshop, unfortunately. Instead, I’m writing this faster post today. It would be nice to get CFAR summaries out while the memories and new ideas are still fresh, but last night’s post took several hours, and I’m just too busy.
What does “too busy” mean?
When I was a wee lad, my dad (whose wisdom has previously been featured on this blog) told me something that has stuck with me to this day as a useful heuristic: instead of saying “I’m too busy”, say “that’s not my priority right now”. Being busy isn’t an absolute condition, it’s a decision about prioritization. I’m not going to write a blog post about my experience of CFAR today, because I want to use my evening to talk and play games with the other people at CFAR instead. That isn’t something I’m forced to do, keeping me from my heart’s desire. No, I’m willingly giving up writing that blog post, because I’ve decided it’s more important to me to talk and play games.
By reframing from “I’m too busy for that” to “I’m not prioritizing that”, we reclaim agency. We aren’t being prevented from doing what we want by outside forces, we’re making decisions about our values. When we switch frames to notice that we’re making decisions, we can start examining those decisions. Are the actions we’re prioritizing actually in line with our values? I can imagine saying “I’m too busy to write about CFAR today” and then spending four hours mindlessly scrolling Twitter, and that wouldn’t be a trade I’m happy with. By saying “I’m not prioritizing writing about CFAR today” instead, I prompt myself to think about what I am prioritizing. It might feel sometimes like you are bound by circumstance, but remember that you’re always making decisions. By noticing the decisions you make, you unlock freedom to align your actions with what you care about.
Halfhaven posts are supposed to be at least 500 words long. This one falls a little short, but there’s a game of Blood on the Clocktower starting and I prioritize participating in that over bulking out this post.